Sunday, April 29, 2007
1:21 am
i discovered that im losing touch with everything lately. im losing touch with people, with lessons, with homework,with tests, with the things i used to do and love and find joy in. i miss my dong bangs! im losing touch with dong bang news too. and there's more things that im unable to describe that i find im losing touch with alr.
this week has been ): actually i don't even know what week this is anymore. week 6? 7? it doesnt really matter. haha. monday was spent trying to do chinese project while agonizing over the results, tuesday was the day we got our news, wednesday was the day i failed in studying chem and just went to sleep. thursday was the last school day. other stuff happened, like the sports day dry run and 2.4 and chem test and speech and health check and zuowen test but suddenly all these stuff seem out-of-touch to me.
we thought that this time we could finally make a breakthrough but i guess it all comes to naught in the end when we're faced with obstacles that we can never conquer no matter how hard we try. the problem isnt that we can try harder next time but that we know we did well but still we don't get our recognition. but its really all over now and i guess its time to return to reality.
speech sucked. chem test sucked. actually everything that happened in this later part of the week kinda sucked. haha. cos i was so drained every day for some reason i reach home and i just feel like sleeping so desperately. even to the point that i can don't care about studying for chemistry. haha. my priorities have really changed this year. i managed to get through chem test by getting an unimaginable amount of information -.- im sorry i know i really suck. haha. for leeching on to everyone so much this year. gahhhh.
i've been seeing alot of
rain lately! haha. i slept in quite late on thrusday morning and i was feeling so peaceful and happy for some reason, at least before i reached school. i just lay in bed for 20 minutes plus while it rained outside then i went to bathe and went to school. on the way there were so many cars and people and the song playing on the radio was so nice and i just felt good. haha. though all that evaporated as the day progressed -.-
sports day was on friday. lessons in the morning were okay and later on we went to eat lunch. it was raining badly halfway through! lots of rain rain rain as i've been saying throughout these few days :D i like it. got the qing piao piao feeling. i like the rain. it gives you the feeling that everyone's somehow together in a way. we couldnt stand in contingents this year and just did cheer on the specs stand. blue house was split up :/ but i thought we were quite loud on the actual day, at least! the view from up the specs stand is unbelievably good. everything can be seen la : D did alot of rubbish stuff (literally) between watching the races and routines and blabla, didnt really get very high. the atmposphere was nowhere compared to what i felt last year. haha. went home with vivian and jacq and we ate lots of food!
today wasnt too bad! had paiju as usual. hurr. WHOLE JU WAS HERE. though that isnt saying much since our strength can be counted on one hand! haha. i think its cute though. me and kahyee were the earliest. thank me for always being a punctual person -.- we pai-ed mostly in the morning and slacked mostly in the aft : D i think most people should be like super anxious by now but i really can't feel a sense of urgency this year. even for all my projects and blabla. aiya. no use feeling stressed since no matter how you feel the thing will still remian the same what. use ping chang xin can already. : D i did 5 yue du bu ties (like 5 compres) at night! yay! and im going to do homework tomorrow with some people's help! : D
i think blogging's cheered me up somewhat. haha. in the beginning i sounded kinda ... but now im feeling not bad! i think its obvious in the post. haha. i want my normal life to resume again! stop sleeping so early, its doing a lot of damage, or at least sleep when i've finished all the important stuff that needs to be done! and i want to understand lessons properly and get my homework done!
lit test amath test napfa midsummer's and i think that's all that's on for next week. plus paijus, of course! there's no school on tuesday yay :D
